So I just saw on Eonline that Beyonce and Jayz got married. Congratulations to them. I have to admit, however, that one part of the initial story left me very upset.
It said that George Clooney was in attendance.
And I wasn’t with him!
So, of course, I called him.
Me: George?
GC: (recognizing my voice immediately) Ally? What’s wrong?
Me: How was the wedding?
GC: What wedding?
Me: The wedding you were photographed attending. The wedding to which I was not your date!
GC: (laughing)
Me: WHAT is so funny?
GC: You’re jealous.
Me: I am not.
GC: It looks good on you.
Me: WE’RE ON THE PHONE!
GC: I have a good imagination.
Me: That is beside the–
GC: Would you have come?
Me: What? Oh…I’m kind of in the middle of a–
GC: Rewrite, yeah. So that’s why I asked. (slower now.) Would. You. Have. Come?
Me: I could have worked on the plane.
GC: You never work on planes. You always SAY you’re going to work on the plane and then you either sleep or do the crossword puzzle in the in-flight magazine. So I ask you again: would you have come?
Me: I don’t know. I’m at a pretty big part in GG3 where—
GC: na.na.na.na I told you I don’t want to know what happens in GG3. I don’t want it spoiled for me.
Me: But it’s–
GC: (louder now. and singing.) I can’t hear you. Hey Matt. (at this point I figured out he was with Matt Damon) I can’t hear Ally. Can you hear Ally?
MD: (Screaming) If Clooney won’t play Joe Solomon I’ve got dibbs!
GC (to MD): I never said I wouldn’t play Solomon. I just said I’ve done CIA before.
MD: Yeah, and I can see how the Oscar might make you steer away from it.
Me: George? Do I really need to be here for this? Like I said, I’m to the part where–
GC: Charlie Rose.
Me: What?
GC: I didn’t go to the wedding. I was in the building doing an interview with Charlie Rose.
Me: (nothing.)
GC: You’re feeling pretty silly now. Aren’t you?
Me: (nothing.)
GC: You’re cute when you’re silly.
Me: We’re on the phone.
OMG!!!! That’s so funny! It makes me think of Zach. Did you base Zach on him?